Why?
by DG85
Summary: A one-shot reuniting Anna and Robert post-Robin.


Italy. Of all the places Ethan could lead them, it had to be Italy, and of all the towns...he had to choose this one. Robert quietly walked the cobbled streets in the dark. He didn't need to see to know where he was going. There was something greater leading him. Holly simply trailed behind him in utter silence as though the same force that led him told her that she did not belong in this space. He felt sorry for her. He knew the love had long since died, but she was a good woman and this had to be uncomfortable for her. She didn't deserve that, but then again he was the master of putting women through things they didn't deserve...particularly those that had the misfortune of having loved him, or still loving him as was the case with Anna. As he reached his destination, her name burned through his mind and through his heart. He lay one hand on the door knob to the house that had once belonged to Filomena and now belonged to Anna...the house that Filomena left her in the belief that one day it would be passed to Robin...the house where there little girl had been born... He couldn't bring himself to enter. He could hear her voice so clearly, "Daddy, where were you when I was burning up in the lab? Where were you when Mommy...

Holly watched as Robert lay his head against the solid oak door before them. He didn't remove his hand from its knob, but he didn't open it either, and she knew why. His guilt. The Robert Scorpio she knew had never been a coward, but the death of his only child had been more than he could bare, so although he knew full well that Ethan was not his son, he'd gone after her boy with gusto when Luke had offered him the possibility. He had run from his pain, and in doing so had caused greater pain to the only person other than Robin that he truly loved...Anna. She lay her hand on his shoulder and prepared to release him for once and for all. She had long ago put to rest her love for him, but her competitive nature and her desire to protect Ethan had won out this time. Not anymore. She would do right by him, by Robin, by Anna, and at the end of the day by herself.

"Robert, we both know the truth. Let's not perpetuate this lie any further. When I lost Luke and then our child, you saved me. Now let me return the favor. We both know Anna's apt to do something foolish without Robin. You were never going to jump Robert...she on the other hand very well may. Leave my child to me, and go mourn yours. Go comfort her mother. Go save her from herself, so that you can both start to heal." As he turned to her with tear stained cheeks and kissed her forehead, Holly finally found peace with the great, Robert Scorpio.

_Anna rushed down the stairs to the lab. Patrick was taking his sweet time to go get Robin and Emma had fallen asleep. She wasn't going to wait anymore. She needed to see her child. She had so many things to tell her. She had wasted so much time, and wouldn't waste anymore. Suddenly, there was a blaring sound and all the lights save one flashing strobe went out._

_She could hear Patrick yelling, "Robin, I'm going to get you out of there."_

_She never ran faster in her life. Her heart stopped as she caught sight of him pounding on the doors amidst Robin's pleas to go get help and to hug Emma. Hug Emma? NO! She skipped the last steps throwing her elbow into the glass that held the fire extinguisher. She didn't even feel the glass cut into her skin as she grabbed it and pushed Patrick out of the way._

_"Mom!" There was such fear in her eyes, but hope as well. As though somehow now that Anna was there, everything would be alright._

_"It's okay, baby. I'm going to get you out. Step back," she yelled above the alarm as she slammed the extinguisher into the glass window of the lab door. The damned thing wouldn't budge._

_"Evacuate. Security doors lock in thirty seconds." Patrick joined her in her efforts._

_"Mom, Patrick, you have to go." Acceptance. Resignation. _

_Screw that, Anna pounded harder. She didn't even hear Patrick say that he was going to go get help, or Robin tell him to get her out of there. She dropped the extinguisher and took out her service revolver. She'd shoot the damn lock to pieces if she had to in order to save her daughter. She was so intent on her task that she didn't feel his arms wrap around her and pull her back until it was too late. She heard the click, and threw herself against the security doors. Her eyes caught Robin's just as the incredible wave of heat threw her back slamming her and Patrick against the wall. From her position on the floor she watched as the flames engulfed her child. _

_"When I was little nothing could hurt me because you'd stop it." _

_Anna looked up shocked as Robin stood next to her. Oh thank God, she was safe, but why didn't it feel right. She turned back toward the lab and could still see Robin standing there amidst the flames._

_"Guess the same doesn't hold true now." The version of Robin standing before turned to the lab with a critical eye. "Do you have any idea how much I hurt right now Mommy?"_

_Anna's heart sank._

_"I should go into shock soon. At least the pain will stop."_

_Her stomach clenched._

_"I wonder what will kill me. Will it be the burns? What's the term? Burned beyond recognition. I wonder if that will happen antemortem or postmortem? Or maybe I'll suffocate? Do you know the smoke will burn my lungs either way?"_

_She retched. Robin was at her side again in an instant rubbing her back. She felt her hair brushed back and Robin's hand tilt her head to face her. It was so cold. "You want to know what I do know?"_

_"Robin, baby, I tri..."_

_"I know what my last thought was, it was: Why, Mommy? Why didn't you try harder? Why didn't you save me?"_

_"I'm sorry, Robin...I'm sorry..."_

_Robin simply smiled and shook her head, and then she was gone._

"NO! ROBIN!"

Luke woke to Anna's screams. It was the third night in as many that the nightmares plagued her. He wished she would confide in him, but he knew she wouldn't. It wasn't the way they functioned. He held no illusions. He was her Ethan. She'd needed something...someone...anything...anyone to occupy her mind, and he'd owed it to her so he had become that someone to distract her from the agony she was in day after day without Robin. He'd been desperate. So he'd sent Robert off on a wild goose chase without stopping to think of the consequences for anyone else. He'd overestimated himself. He'd thought he could get her through so that Robert could run from his pain until he outran it. Now he wasn't so sure. Anna was careening toward a cliff and hell if he knew how to work the breaks. He gently shook her awake, and wasn't surprised when she instantly turned away from him and hugged her pillow. He knew what she needed, and he wasn't it. So he contented himself with giving her what she wanted, and went back to his own room. He pretended not to hear her crying the moment he closed the door.

Anna for her part had to laugh. Why did she even bother hiding the tears anymore? What did it matter if Luke saw her cry? She could see it in his eyes every time he looked at her...the poorly veiled concern and the panic because he had no Earthly idea what to do with her. Hiding her tears wasn't going to fool him or anyone else for that matter. The same look that Luke had was the one held by most people in this town when they looked at her. Felicia was the only one that looked at her with any normalcy, but she was busy rebuilding her life with Mac, so Anna was left with the pity of the majority. On second thought there was one other person that didn't pity her, Patrick. Hard to pity someone you loathe. He blamed her, and she knew it. He'd shut her out of his life, and of Emma's, after screaming at her that she was just going to walk away like she'd walked away from Robin so many times. Maybe she should. She needed a break. There was nothing left to lose. She'd given up the agency to have time with Robin and Emma which certainly wouldn't be happening now. Right now she relished the idea of a maniac with a bomb...more than anything she relished the idea of it going off. Exhaustion was making her delirious, but she was terrified to go back to sleep. Where were those pills Webber gave her? Those would knock her out so profoundly that hopefully she would avoid watching Robin die before her again.

Luke sat in his room listening to the quiet. To be honest, he preferred the tears. At least then, he knew she was in one piece. In pain, but in one piece. She wouldn't be sleeping anymore tonight. She never did after a nightmare, so he wouldn't be either. He owed it to her and to Robert to keep guard. A soft knock at the door interrupted his watch. When he opened the door, no words were necessary. He simply gave his oldest friend a nod and walked away. He wasn't needed here. Maybe he'd head to Ireland for a spell, or maybe he'd go chase Dodge for awhile, light the world afire with English, or maybe he'd go have a talk with Spanky...

Just as in Italy, Robert found that a force greater than himself led him straight to Anna's door. He opened it to find her sitting on the bed toying with a bottle of pills.

"Thinking of ending it all, Luv."

For some reason his presence didn't surprise her, the man had always had the worst timing. "Hello, Robert. Finally find and secure the prodigal son?"

"I never fancied you the pill type. Too quiet. Too passive. You need your blaze of glory." He didn't miss her almost imperceptible flinch at the word blaze.

"Yes because free falling off a much too short bridge would have been so glorious."

"Not really, but it had a certain sentimental value, and it certainly wouldn't be going gently into that good night."

"What it would have been was messy and inefficient."

"Can't have that now can we? Have to tie things up nice and neat. Be good boys and girls. That's never been your style, Luv."

"It's the least I can do, isn't. I'm not exactly deserving of glory," she answered finally looking up at him.

The pain he saw reflected back at him was like a dagger. He remembered the night Lavery had died the first time. Anna had gone into deep denial. Crying over and over again that he couldn't be dead. None of that denial was present tonight, only defeat. He walked over to her and sat down on the bed beside her. "You know I can't let you do this, right? Robin would never forgive me."

Anna rocketed off the bed throwing the pills at him. "Well, she's not here, is she"? But don't worry Robert, I was only going to take two so that I could sleep. I may not have earned glory, but I sure as hell don't deserve peace either."

Robert stood and firmly gripped her by the arms, "Anna. Listen to me. You are not to blame for what happened. It is not your fault our little girl died."

"Yes it is, Robert." There was no hiding the tears now. Damn him.

"How do you suppose that? I'm the Dad. I'm the one that was supposed to protect her and you. If anyone is at fault here, Luv, it's me."

She looked him straight in the eye, "You're the dad, but I'm the Mommy. It's the mommy's job to make everything all better. I wasn't there, Robert. I was two floors up putting Emma to bed while _my_ baby burned to death."

"I'll do you one better...I was half way around the world saving someone else's child."

Finally things started to click for him, when she looked at him and simply said, "Exactly."

"Anna, don't do this to yourself."

"You were half way around the world. I was two, count them, two floors above her. If I had just gone instead of Patrick..."

"You would have done what exactly. Do you think Patrick didn't do everything in his power?"

"No, but you said it yourself, he's a civilian." He heard her voice crack on the last word and knew the battle was almost over.

"It wouldn't have mattered, Luv. The security doors locked, and as soon as they did, it was all over."

He said it with such authority that she almost believed him, but it didn't change the facts. "She died in pain Robert. I'm her mother and I didn't stop it from happening. What kind of mother am I? I failed her again. Every time it mattered, I failed her, and she _still_ had faith in me."

"She had faith in both of us."

"But at least you went to her Robert. I couldn't even bring myself to do that much for her. After you left Robert, I couldn't lift that sheet, and at the funeral I was glad Robert. I was glad that we were leaving before they took her body away. I couldn't face it. I just couldn't. I couldn't say good-bye." She was shaking by now, and he hated himself for what he had to do, but he knew he knew he had to do it. He let go of her arms and took her into his holding onto her as tightly as he dared. Her response was instant.

Anna felt Robert's arms in circle her and fought with every fiber of her being. She couldn't to this...she was holding on by a thread. If she let go...damn him...DAMN HIM!

"Let go, Robert! You have no right! LET GO!"

"No." She felt his grip tighten and lost her fight. There were no silent tears this time nor were there quiet cries.

Robert felt her release and steeled himself as harsh sobs overtook her body. He didn't let go as she beat against him wailing, "My baby!" He had run too many times, and this time he owed it to her and to their daughter's memory to stick around and face this tragedy. Slowly her fists lost their muster, but still he held tight letting her cry and for once crying with her.


End file.
